i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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