My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
