office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
