..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
