remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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