Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize