How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
