her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Randomize
