I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
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