I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize