Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
