I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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