Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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