he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
