How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
