My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
