at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Randomize
