how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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