Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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