There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
