So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
