I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
