wrigley field is MILF paradise
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
This is my gift to your gina
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
