I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Just puked most of my soul out..
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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