i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize