That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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