when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
