I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Randomize
