So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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