What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
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