end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
