This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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