Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize
