At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
So vagazzling was a success
I would fuck him just for his dog
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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