problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
