You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
