Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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