You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
