YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
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