My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
