i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
i've created a new STD.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
