I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
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