After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
