i need an iv and a liver transplant
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
