its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize