Don't you send me to vm
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize