physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
