im holly from the hills drunk
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize