My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Randomize
