I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize