4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Randomize
