I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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